I've been thinking about blogging and thinking about blogging, but why you ask ... why then Kari ... why haven't you been blogging? That is a very good question, and the answer is simple - I banned myself from the computer.
It all began on Wednesday morning when I woke up nauseous ... very nauseous. As I was being sick, we called my doctor to see if I needed to come in for my noon chemotherapy session (my first session). The answer surprised me but Eric was right on the money - YES! So, off we went down Lake Shore Dr. We grabbed the first wheelchair in the parking garage and Eric wheeled a very sick looking patient (I can only imagine) into the Cancer Center. There were many patients awaiting their chemo that looked at me and were very happy they weren't in my shoes. I can't blame them; I was a wreck. More vomiting ensued, but eventually they got me a room, gave me an anti-nausea medication, and I was nearly back to normal. I still had a low grade fever and was generally feeling "off." They decided to put off the therapy drugs (chemotherapy drugs that is) until the following Thursday when I was (fingers crossed) feeling better.
The question did however remain -- Why? Why was I so ill the morning of my first chemotherapy session? The verdict is still out on this question. It could have been one of many flu strands. Or it could have been Mastitis. Mastitis is a breast infection usually caused by engorgement or too much milk. I had too much milk because I was attempting to feed Brennan less and less milk everyday up until chemo; I couldn't feed him once chemo began as the chemo drugs would be in my breastmilk. My Oncologist wasn't sure whether or not I had Mastitis as he didn't deal with it very often, so while we were at the Oncologists office, the oncology nurse practitioner called my OBGYN's office who, in turn, called in an antibiotic for me and set up an appointment for the next day.
The next day the OBGYN took a look at this supposed Mastitis and wasn't convinced. He did however think it was best for me to focus my attention on the Lymphoma and not on my engorged breasts (smart man). He instructed me to bind my breasts (yes bind) for the next 5 to 7 days or until the milk stopped. The reason this old practice is no longer in use (or at least Dr. Kari surmises) is because woman who bound their breasts would rid themselves of breast milk, but would pick up a breast infection in the process. To combat this possibility, the OBGYN left me on the antibiotics. Side note - I don't actually have an OBGYN; I have a Midwife. This particular OBGYN works in the same practice as my midwife. I saw my midwife in the hallway on my way to the OBGYN's exam room, and she was not ecstatic about the breast binding. But, I chose my doctor for the day as I wanted someone who had a "M" and a "D"after their name. I think it was the right choice in retrospect; more about this at the end of this entry.
One side note that really pulled on my heart strings was that my doctor's talked. Yes yes, the OBGYN wanted to confer with the Oncologist, so he paged him in the middle of my appointment. My oncologist wasn't able to get back to him while I was there, but they did eventually speak that day. My OBGYN (yes yes... I now refer to him as "my" OBGYN) called me at home at 6:45 pm to tell me that not only were my two doctor's in agreement, but that my OBGYN confirmed my wonderful prognosis with my Oncologist.
In the end, I started to feel better in two or three days, but didn't stop producing milk for six days. I wasn't vomiting anymore, but I did feel ill through Saturday night. My breasts stopped producing milk the following Wednesday morning.
Why? Are you still asking why I banned myself from the computer during this time period? The answer is simple - because I was afraid that my nausea on the Wednesday morning of my first chemotherapy session was caused in part by anxiety, and I didn't want anything online line to exacerbate that anxiety. Silly - possibly, but it worked .... you'll see.
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